There Isn't Much To It

I've been thinking about creating some sort of subpage to release some short written works that didn't make it into a book of mine. Originally I thought about doing it within blog posts but I feel like they deserve their own platform, after all they are their own separate works.

April to June is always an intense time for me. The school year's wrapping up, things are trying to be planned, there's no energy left but you don't have a choice but to keep going. It's exhausting but atleast there's a light at the end of the foreseeable tunnel. (supposedly).

During this time, I'm also working on separating myself from other's experiences in existing. Not isolating myself, but learning that other's emotions are not my responsibility. It can be tough. I've grown up being the person that will do anything for anyone and I've been told more times than I can count that if someone was upset, it was my fault. (even if it wasn't). Now that I'm in a place, surrounded by likeminded adults who have their own issues, I find it hard to separate their distance from my being. I'm not there but I'm learning, it's okay for someone to be upset and want space from you. Not because they're mad at you or that you did something, but sometimes even when you're sad and you want to hangout with them to make you feel better, it doesn't mean they want the same. They can have space and you don't have to question your value in their life because of it.

I find times like these are good excuses to focus on yourself. If you already know they're not going to reach out to you today, why sit around and wait in the first place? Go out on your own, for your own good. Do something that makes you happy and if they happen to text you, that's amazing. If not, you will be okay. Allow yourself to hurt if you do but don't let it consume you. It isn't worth it to borrow their grief to feed your own.

Keep an eye out for some little subpages of writing from me and tell me about how you're feeling today below.

Sending love,

Becca